A Pick-Me-Up

There’s this professor at work who likes to tease John. He’s in his 60s, has as much energy as a 4-year old, speaks like a good Jersey boy (which he is), and drives John to distraction with wacky conversations. Here’s one from today:

Professor: Hey, John! Come on. Leave your Mom here and you come with me to McDonalds.

John: No (hiding behind my legs).

Professor: What?! You’re not going to eat?? But then you’ll never grow tall!

John: I will too grow tall!

Professor: No you won’t. Not if you don’t come with me to McDonalds. You’ll always stay this tall (lowering his hand to John’s height).

John: I will not! I will eat, but not with you. Mommy says not to go places with people.

Professor: What are you going to do when you’re in high school and you’re just this tall, but you’re girlfriend is THIS tall and she wants to kiss you? How can she kiss you if you’re just this tall????

John: complete silence for about 30 seconds while he tries to understand high school, girlfriends, and kissing, then he screams at the professor . . .

“WELL SHE’LL HAVE TO PICK ME UP!!!”

Oh, we all laughed so hard.

B.